I'm an avid watcher of the show "The New Normal, " a story that deals with a homosexual couple and their experiences with their "abnormal" family in preparation for their baby. If you haven't seen this show-please do! It's amazing.
Enough advertising for "The New Normal".
In one of the recent episodes, Brian and David, the two main characters, do not like the idea of a full-time nanny/helper, therefore they want one of them to be a stay-at-home dad. Both take up the challenge by watching their surrogate's daughter and they come to realize that it's no easy job.
Parents often times worry about the effects and the adequate learning and child care children receive from nannies compared to those raised by their moms, but home many times do we consider males as child carers?
Our most recent reading assignment discusses the differences between girls and boy and their "gender role identification" that they receive and develop from their primary source of socialization: the mother in the home. Although nowadays the majority of couples are both in the workforce, women continue to be the stay-at-home parents for at least some period of time. If our first interactions and socialization with our mother develop our gender role and its meaning, this made me wonder: what would our gender roles and our understanding of them look like if men/fathers were the ones who stayed home and socialized children?
What do you think it would look like?
Wow! It sounds like a cool show!!!
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I am not sure what our society and our gender roles would look like if men were the ones who stayed home and took care of the kids. It's like we say in class, it is hard to imagine because we really do not know any different. I know from my own experience, and from talking to other girls, that Dads tend to let their daughters pretty much get away with anything, while they can be stern on the boys at times. However, I did read an article one time about a woman discussing her "Manny" (male nanny) that her and her husband hired for their 3 kids. She said that she liked having a male nanny better than a female one because they are more physical with the kids (in a roughhousing and playing sort-of-way), and they give the kids another male figure (besides the father) to look up to. I think that she has a good point, because I feel that when either boys or girls grow up without a father-figure then this causes them a lot of problems. I feel that men need a good father-figure to look up to and learn how to act like, and girls need a good father figure to help them learn about men (how they should be treated by men, etc). I realize that kids can get all of this from their moms, but it really does take two parents to raise a child (whether it be heterosexual or homosexual), and possibly having a male figure to look up to is helpful for young kids.
Here's an article about male nannies:
http://www.sfgate.com/living/article/Parents-dialing-manny-911-for-help-Male-2512344.php
As I was reading the article for class discussions I couldn't help but think about me and my brother's experience of being raised by a single mother. Although I can't account for my brother's personal feelings regarding this, I have to wonder how differently our lives may be now if we had our father's in our life. I think my brother is a great man, and I think he wants more than anything to have the type of family structure (mom, dad, and kids) that we didn't necessarily experience. However, growing up, my brother and I basically switched stereotypes; I liked getting dirty, playing football, and working on cars and tractors, and my brother liked to stay inside playing video games,or with my barbie dolls, and hanging around my mom. As we've gotten older, I've definitely recognized a shift in the kind of relationship we both have with our mom. I'm a lot closer to her now than I ever was, and my brother has pretty much distanced himself from both of us. Although we have always had a stable father figure (my grandpa) I often wonder how our lives might have played out differently if our biological fathers had been around; then again, I'm thankful they weren't.
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