This weekend was my first experience at a Bar. I went to Purdue to visit with some friends, and we went to a few popular bars for the first time together. Only somewhat surprising to myself, I didn't enjoy the experience. The way in which the bars are set up to function only allows one type of interaction -- looking and then deciding to approach or not.
While I was there with two other girlfriends just trying to talk and enjoy the experience, we all had to avoid eye contact with people left and right. The second you looked around the bar for too long and happened to make eye contact with a boy he would start moving toward you until you diverted your eyes.
It was one of my first direct experiences with the male gaze, male superiority, the idea that women are asking for something and men have the choice to react or not. It was a bit disheartening but eye-opening at the same time.
I too have had this experience and it is really disheartening to feel like we are only approachable because of looks. Also when alcohol is involved I feel like there is no real connection and the guy has an alternative motive behind his friendliness
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